I feel as though, as being an advocate for feminism and women’s rights, it can be pretty difficult to look past all of the adversity women everywhere face. My focus is always on the defensive, trying to educate and bring awareness to issues that have yet to be resolved, bring to light the stories of women who don’t yet have the justice they deserve, just trying to convince the world that we’re here, and we matter, really. I love doing it though, I kind of love arguing, I love being passionate about something, and boy do I love it when I’m right. But the other day, I began thinking to myself, am I happy that my life is this way? Would I ever change what I identify as, will that make things easier? Not that in my everyday life I face huge, earth-shattering consequences because I am a woman, but even the smaller things add up.
The answer however, is no.
As much as I love to rant about all the challenges the female population face and how sick I am of all the stuff some women have to deal with, I know I would never change who I am for a second. I’m sure identifying as any of the other many genders in and outside the binary is equally if not more fun, and of course, your identity is deeply personal and entirely up to you. It simply depends on what makes you feel most like yourself, and I know for myself that is being a girl. What does that even mean though? I know there’s no set definition or limits to what it means to be a girl and I am kind of in love with it and I don’t think I say it nearly enough. Here’s a couple reasons (in no particular order) why I love being a part of this community:
1) I can cry.
As a woman, I have never been expected to adhere to traditional aspects of masculinity and have always been free, encouraged even, to outwardly express my emotions. I’ve never had to hide my tears in fear that I would be considered less worthy of my identity, and I am so grateful to be able to have this emotional outlet without having to get past certain standards put into place about what I should and should not feel. Yes, there’s that tiny catch where people believe all that emotion running free hinders our ability to do certain tasks….but that’s for another post.
2) I’m a part of this huge family.
There’s something so unifying amongst the female community. We cheer one another on, empathize with each other, empower ourselves. I feel at some deeper level, we all just know and understand each other. It’s truly a sisterhood and every day I get to look up to all these amazing fellow women out there, being badasses and defying all odds, and say “I’m a part of that.”
3) It makes me feel like I’m a force to reckon with.
Fighting the good fight against the patriarchy is tiring, but oh man does it give me a rush. Like I mentioned before, just being able to debate and talk about important issues fuels this fire that I crave and thrive on. There’s still something to strive towards and not everything falls into place, but that’s what makes it interesting.
4) The relationships we form are powerful.
Though everyone’s relationships are diverse and widely vary from person to person, I have just found that the meaningful and successful interactions between women are like no other. The bond between a mother and her daughter, two best friends, two sisters, etc is special and unexplainable almost. There’s just something there that is always blossoming, evolving, to become more and more indestructible.
5) Femininity is a bonus.
Of course, you don’t have to be female to feminine and if you are a woman and don’t want anything to do with femininity that’s awesome too, do what makes you feel like you. For me however, being femme is a big part of my gender expression. I love skirts and softness and fluttery lashes and ruby lips and twirling around in a field full of flowers, all that girly crap. I love it.
6) I am shaped by all of the women before me.
I feel as though I am a result of all the women I have ever met, read about, or looked up to. Each and every one of them have had a part in influencing me to become who I am, and I know they have been forged from the consciousnesses of those before them, as well. We are composed of one another but at the same time are completely one-of-a-kind and entirely multi-faceted.
There is so much more to say but I feel like this is a good place to stop. It’s certainly not easy to be a woman but we are strong as hell because of it. This is just my two cents however, and whatever I mentioned here is kind of particular to me. What do you love about your gender?
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