The issue of equality, or rather, inequality, between men and women has been long debated, questioned and criticized. I’m here to point out some arguments from hopefully what all of you will view as conciliatory.
1) Creation of woman from man.
Let’s go back to the origins from a religious point of view. Long story short: man is lonely, God takes man’s rib, woman is made, man is happy. Does this automatically signify superiority of men over women? Just take note, without women, we are all doomed to extinction. This story should also not be utilized against women. What I mean is, women were not created solely for satisfying a men’s loneliness. They were created to cooperatively harvest the Earth given by God.
2) “Girls can do what guys can do.”
You hear this statement a lot. Especially when some girls are fussing over a comment made by a dude about how they can’t do something guys do easily. Girls don’t say this because they believe it to be absolutely true all the time. For example, no, we can’t lift the same amount of weights guys can because it’s even more strenuous an activity because of the way our bodies are built. With that said, there are some things that men aren’t as capable of doing. However girls do say it because first, we don’t want to hear that we’re any less apt than guys and second, we can do many things guy can do by our own means.
3) Being a gentleman isn’t easy.
No, I can’t imagine what it’s like because I’m a girl. But to be a gentleman is to carry girl’s bags, pay for their dates, lend them their jacket or umbrella, waiting patiently for girls to get ready, respect them, and so much more. Of course it must not be easy. But it isn’t easy being a lady either! None of us like to be around people who lack hygiene. But girls are especially more pressed on the matter. Getting nails done, hair done, eyebrows plucked, hair waxed, buying then wearing high heels, buying hair accessories and jewellery… do you know how much that costs??
4) Conscription into the military.
When you think army, you think soldiers, you think men. If things are equal, women would be called on duty just as much. But if you think about it, women do so much more in a daily setting. People all go to school, get a job, work, come home. But women bear children, nurture children, clean the house, cook the food. If men can’t do that, someone has to. And I hate to state that that’s expectations for a woman, but frankly, men aren’t as attuned to housework.
5) When girls beat guys.
Guys need to accept that girls are progressively getting more independent and stronger. I remember when I was in summer school, the teacher would say “You got corrected by a girl!” when I refuted a guy’s answer. But why is that a time to sneer at guys? Do we set the standards for a girl so low as to think they can never surpass a guy? Is this a matter of maintaining one’s “macho”? Do guys naturally believe they are better? I certainly hope not, because they are in for a big surprise. If you ever visit an IB class, you’ll see that girls are constantly excelling and receiving outstanding marks in comparison with guys. But that’s not to say guys are dim. You just see more girls like that nowadays.
6) “Piece of meat”
Girls hate it when guys see them merely as a “piece of meat.” As in, girls hate it when guys date them merely for the physical enjoyment, rather than emotional attachment. But girls do the same thing to guys as well, don’t they? They drool over pictures of good looking guys and often times attempt to win their favour for a sensuous reason.
7) Stereotypes for women
Men often think women are stereotypically weak and sensitive. This argument is going to be a little biased, in that I will be defensive. Girls go through a ton of hardships. As do guys of course, but let me elaborate. Girls go through a number of heartbreaks, fusses about her face, body and hair even more than guys, they have a “time of the month” which is distressing, feel pressured to be thin and tall, have to clean, have to cook, have a constant fear of not being good enough for guys on top of trying to survive school. On the other hand, guys aren’t expected to have a tidy room or to make dinner. But they do go through their own hardships. But just because you can’t see the hardships a girl goes through visibly, does not imply she is weak.
Random: which hurts more- guys being kicked in the nuts or girls giving birth?
Neither knows the supposedly tremendous amount of pain inflicted by their respective situations. For guys, getting kicked in their most sensitive area is enough to cause them to fall down in agony. In extreme cases, they may even become infertile. For girls, giving birth exposes them to a much higher amount of pain than any human can normally withstand. But it is true that women typically have more than one child in her lifetime. Why? Because after labour, our bodies release a hormone that makes us forget the pain of giving birth, thus making it more likely we will want to conceive again.
Hopefully I haven’t aggravated anyone, male or female. What I hope to get across is that, it’s not easy being either one of the genders. Maybe with a little more respect and understanding for each other, we could co-exist more peacefully.
Male chauvinism is simply ridiculous. Though I would like to point out MJ’s thoughtfully crafted post does reveal something appalling. If we are talking about human nature, “Let’s go back to the human origin from a religious point of view.” Eve ate the Apple from the Tree of Knowledge, why? On the surface it seems convenient to accept that the Snake was the culprit. Really? I, too, would like to join in the blame game that has come to define our approach to serious issues. As MJ so articulately explained in bullet 2), “girls can do what guys can do.” It only takes a modicum of perceptiveness to discern the thinly veiled innuendo in that platitude. Clearly, what MJ is trying to convey is that women generally have a latent, over-eager desire to prove their capabilities, propelled by a burning sense of feminine pride. What was Eve thinking then, when she reached so boldly for the Apple, an equally bold conjecture would be “If I can’t have the muscle, might as well get the brain.” Though that may be a bit too cynical, but the truth often is inconvenient. So, where would Adam be today if it wasn’t for Eve? For one, still chilling in the Garden of Eden and taking it easy. Of course then again, there would not be any male chauvinism or whatever else that adds fuel to women’s burning desire to prove themselves. Of course, that is not to say people are not allowed to make mistakes, if my parents didn’t I wouldn’t be here.
I agree with you when you state that “any male chauvinism… adds fuel to women’s burning desire to prove themselves.” Women do have a tendency to prove their capabilities but if not for the omnipresent inferiority they feel, they would have no desire in the first place, to simply put it. I think you made a lot of valid points, but those arguments are foundationally based on the assumption that the story of Adam and Eve is true. I wonder, if we simply didn’t know who came first, would anything be any different? What validity does the story hold in our society?
Thanks for your feedback Dave!
I know more legit geniuses that are male than female.
Interesting article. The only point I’d like to raise is the idea of equality on all fronts. Though you didn’t specifically mention it in your article there is the whole issue of a double standard. A woman wants equality but still wants to be treated like a princess by the man, or a woman wants equality but when she attacks a man she expects no retaliation. This, in fact, is a major problem in the justice scene. It is seen as humiliating for a man to have been beat up by a woman and thus they fail to report it, or be taken seriously when they do. The Male vs Female gender gap will probably never go away, or at least, not for a long time. Even from an early age girls are told that they should be a princess and guys are told they should be firefighters right? In my opinion we need to cast aside these initial stereotypes if any sort of progress is to be made. That being said, there has been a great degree of change in the last sixty or so years for the better (see: Civil Rights + Feminist movement), and I hope it keeps up.
True, but would you treat a woman as a man? Would you then expect the same things from her as you would from a man? And so what if she wants to be treated like a princess, is there any wrong in that? Is there any wrong in guys wanting respect from their girlfriends as well? Maybe it’s not exactly retaliation that girls don’t want to see. Maybe it stems from the injustice imposed on her due to her being a female, not from the actual context of problems.
Hm, I’m not sure that’s generally true when you say girls are told they should be a princess. I may be wrong, but in my culture, girls are definitely not told those things. I don’t think those stereotypes hold so strongly in society anymore. Nowadays, it’s ubiquitous that girls explore the prospect of male-dominant professions, such as doctors.
Another point is the respective effects of certain situations on genders. For example, if a female is being lascivious in her actions, she’s labelled “slut”, “maneater” or other such negative titles. But you don’t see a male being frowned upon by others, if not applauded for it.
I understand your points, but that’s not quite what I was saying. I’m saying the feminism train goes both ways, as it should. When I was growing up, I distinctly remember all my female cousins and friends being brought up with this notion of being a princess, though I suppose it could be subjective and has changed over the past decade.
The whole business about being a “slut” brings up a slew of other concerns. There was a comedian who talked about it a while ago (link at the bottom). He basically said “Being a slut is easy, because women are the ones who consent, it’s tough to be a stud. To be a slut you just have to be there”
Don’t get me wrong I totally understand what you’re saying and I agree, but what I’m saying is that equality MEANS equality. I always see a double standard imposed within the feminism movement (which I outlined in my previous post) and that is what doesn’t sit right with me. By all means, I am happy to facilitate equality, I try to do so on a daily basis, but why am I still subject to this “gentleman” scrutiny, this obligation to pay for drinks, buy clothes, take abuse and just deal with it. Men aren’t all bad, nor are females, so overt generalizations should be avoided.
Men and women are different in many ways, and their psychology is sometimes even influenced by their biology (estrogen and testosterone). As such, I think the term equality needs to be redefined and clarified to what really matters, or what is really important. Men and women will never be truly equal because men will be better than women at some things and vice versa. It’s why I sometimes get upset when I read comments like “All men are pigs” or “all women are just shallow”. It’s not true!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jaiMzLhliA
Well this whole issue is hard to reach a consensus on, seeing as how both sides feel so discontent about their positions. When you say that equality means equality, it’s kind of easier said than done. Whatever standards a man thinks is equal will not be the same as a woman’s standards for equality. So for starters, what does it really mean to be equal?
Personally, I don’t really expect men to be gentlemen. Well, not the kind of gentlemen that you would probably think. Yes, both genders should respect the thoughts and opinions of one another but they should never conform to each other’s desires. Men should stand their ground when it’s appropriate, and as should women.
I do agree with you that there will never (realistically speaking) be a time when they will be truly equal because of preexisting bias. And although there may be people from both genders that share similar beliefs as you, we can’t ignore the fact that there are still people who really are “shallow pigs.”
And thanks for the video! It was an interesting watch.