Having an anxiety attack is bad enough. Feeling like you’re weak because of it or being told that you need to try better to “push through it” does not make the situation easier. At all.
We all get anxious sometimes, and those of us who are teenagers seem to be extra skilled at having anxiety. Tests, relationships, peer pressure, work, etc.
Sometimes it just all becomes too much. And for those who struggle with an anxiety disorder, that “too much” feeling can come easier and more intensely. For some, an anxiety attack could just come up out of the blue. For others, triggers like noise, crowds, tests, stress, or decisions can be what tips them over the edge into an anxiety attack. The cause for anxiety attacks can vary, and furthermore, the attack itself can look different for everybody. Common elements of anxiety attacks include unsteadiness, blurred vision, feeling like you’re moving at a different pace/disassociated, lightheadedness, and feeling like you’ve lost control.
Picture this: I’m standing at the front of a church at a music workshop as part of a choir. Everyone else is called up, including the band and strings players. As people begin crowding around me, I feel trapped. It feels like I’m frozen in the middle of a commotion of movement and noise around me. It feels like the world is moving all around me. On top of the movement and talking, the instrumentalists individually start to toot and squeak and bash and screech. It’s like a storm is enveloping me. So much is happening at once, I feel so small and so powerless. If only I wasn’t in the eye of others, I’d sit down, for my legs can’t seem to hold up my unsteadiness and lightheadedness. My eyes dart around, stimulated by all the noise and movement, but also trying to make eye contact and let someone know I need help. My eyes are watery and tears start trickling down. I can’t get out of the situation, so I must breathe deeply and with intention. Still, tears swell in my eyes, and my head is woozy. As the conductor settles everyone down and begins putting things together, I can breathe easier, but still I am shaken.
It brings a feeling of weakness. Not just the physical unsteadiness, but also mentally as you feel like you shouldn’t be anxious or cry or that you should be able to handle this. That feeling that you’re “over-reacting” or being “over-dramatic”. On the one hand, it must be recognized that there are strategies to fight anxiety and cope more effectively. However, severe anxiety can be a mental disorder, and I want you all to know that it is NOT your fault. You are not weak. You are not “whiny”. You are not “over-dramatic”. Everyone experiences situations differently, and everyone has different levels of sensitivity. For some of us, things feel like “too much” quite often. But guess what? That does not define us. We are just as valuable, just as strong, just as capable, and just as awesome as anyone else.
My one request is that if you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety or any other mental health concern, please, please seek help. No one deserves to live a life that is more difficult than it needs to be. Their is therapy, medication, and other treatment options that do work. Never lose hope <3
If you are at risk right now, or if you simply need someone to talk to, Kids Help Phone, ConnecTeen, Woods Homes, and the Distress Centre can provide you with immediate help over the phone or through messaging.
